Look
by Kou
Summary: A little song fic about Zelgadiss and his feelings for Xelloss, light shounen ai.


The lyrics are from the song "Iris" By the Goo Goo Dolls. I don't own them. They are represented in ~*~  
If you are offended by a relationship involving Xelloss and Zelgadiss I would not read this, though its just really light shounen ai ^__^  
  
Look  
By: Kou  
  
~*~And I'd give up forever to touch you   
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow   
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be   
And I don't want to go home right now~*~   
  
There you are, floating around with your smile, your laugh, your secretive nature, your beautiful body and your long slim, but strong arms. I'd give up everything just to be held by you once. My powers, they come no where near as close to yours. My soul, what's left of a torn and useless one.  
  
I know you can feel my fear, and in my dreams, Xelloss. But it's not because of the fight, it because I fear that I'll loose you, that I'll die and never see you again. Even in death I would still long for you.  
  
Even though you're a Mazoku, you're my angel . . . my God . . . my everything. Every time that I see you I feel like I'm in heaven. No, more then heaven. You are everything to me.  
  
That's right . . . go ahead and trick us again, by not telling us that the search we're on right now won't lead us to what we want, or where we need to be. It causes you to stay longer, and that's what I want. I don't want this to end; I want to be with you no matter what.  
  
~*~And all I can taste is this moment   
And all I can breathe is your life   
'Cause sooner or later it's over   
I just don't want to miss you tonight~*~   
  
I've died and gone to heaven. You're holding me in your arms . . . But of course, it's because you saved me. Not that I'm disappointed, but you tell me I should be more careful and do your usual "Make the Chimera mad" game. Of course, I'm not really mad I just act that way, because I know that if I do it encourages you and that means you're around me more.  
  
I can fell your life as I breathe. Sort of like you being able to sense pain and fear, but it's different for me. I feel your life, your spirit surrounding me. Almost drowning me in feelings. But you set me down and pat me on the head in a joking manner and I pretend to get upset again, well not just pretend I am angry you set me down, I loved the feeling of being in your arms.  
  
We stop at an Inn and you're off again to your master. Why can't you for once stay? I want you to be as near to me as possible. I don't want you away; I miss you to much as it is even though you don't think twice about me. I can't stop thinking of you, you'll only be gone for a little while and I know that. You'll be back to do continue out whatever you're suppose to do, but you're still gone and I miss you.  
  
~*~And I don't want the world to see me   
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand   
When everything's made to be broken   
I just want you to know who I am~*~   
  
Maybe the hood and the mask will hide me. I don't want them to see me, I'm ugly. Only a Chimera, not worth anything, and defiantly not worth of you. And they would never understand just how I feel about you Xelloss. Amelia would break down and cry and Lina would get mad at me for that. They wouldn't understand just how much I need you and I'm sure you wouldn't either. But maybe... maybe when this is all over, when I'm a human again, you'll really get to see me the way I want you too.  
  
~*~And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming   
Or the moment of truth in your lies   
When everything feels like the movies   
And you bleed just to know you're alive~*~   
  
It hurts me so much to see you flirt with Lina. Smiling at her, flirting her and the fact that you actually kissed her once. I can feel the tears come to my eyes. I can't let anyone see me... I have to leave for awhile. Of course they all think I'll be searching for a cure.  
  
Why did Xelloss have to follow me? Why? I love it, but not now. I don't think I can handle it. Come any closer Xelloss and I don't know if I'll be able to take it. Fine you come along, you should know that's going to make me do something; I won't be responsible for my actions.  
  
~*~And I don't want the world to see me   
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand   
When everything's made to be broken   
I just want you to know who I am~*~   
  
I know your siting in that tree above me; I act like I don't see you. I hide my face more as I stare at the fire, tilting my head down so you have trouble looking at me. Thoughts run through my head, not just of you, but of what they might think about me. If they found out about what I think of you.  
  
Coming down from your perch to tease me, eh? Well, you come down here I'll do something that I know you would never expect. I'm just the quite, easy to tease, Chimera.  
  
Didn't expect *that* did you? Aren't you going to react to this? Why aren't you acting? Oh well, it's nice to feel your lips with my own. You have a taste that I can't describe. Oh this is heaven, but you'll most likely kill me when this is over. Or tease me and tell the others, which then of course I'd kill myself, but might as well enjoy this while I can.  
  
You start to move, I pull away, and I turn away. I'm waiting for you to kill me, to tease me and laugh. But nothing comes... what's going on? I thought you'd have at least made fun of me by now... maybe poke me. I turn back to see you and there's a look on your face that I can't describe. What is it?  
  
~*~I just want you to know who I am ~*~  
  
You stand there just looking at me, you start to bend down right next to me. Stretching out a hand to my face, so you're going to kill me by breaking my neck. Well at least you'll be the one to kill me. But, you hold my face and peer into my eyes, with your amethyst eyes. Then you do something unexpected a small, but simple "Why?" is uttered from your lips.  
  
Why? You ask why? Cause your everything and anything. You're what I live and would die for, but I can't tell you that. But... "Because, I wanted you to see me." Slight shock runs through your face and a small gentle smile appears.   
  
~*~I just want you to know who I am ~*~  
  
"I see you Zelgadiss. I've noticed you for a long time" Thousands of thoughts reel through my mind. "But I'm a Chimera... why are you looking at me?" Your eye's wide open, they are telling me things. A soft sigh escapes you and you speak again with a gentle tone, one I've never heard before. "I see more then the Chimera. And I like what I see"  
  
You reach out and take me into your arms, your strong slender arms. You trap my lips with a kiss and my world spins. You gently break off, I wonder for a moment "But do you really know *me*? Do you really see me?" That same gentle smile is on your lips and you use that same gentle tone. "I can see who you are, not just the Chimera, you. But I don't know all of you, I wish to find out."  
  
You kiss me again, it's a deeper kiss, one that I put all the want I've ever had to you in. I wrap my arms around your neck and the thought comes to me, I finally got something that I've searched for.  
  
~*~I just want you to know who I am ~*~  
  
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Reviews are begged for ^__^ 


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